Look what I just found: An old article I wrote in 2005, for Chicago magazine, titled “Fling Theory.” I love the title the editors came up with for it, as well as the dek: “Meet the new breed of commitment phone: a text-messaging, party-hopping connoisseur of the casual affair—who just happens to be a woman. And even at 31, she’s too busy having the time of her life to think about settling down.”

“Connoisseur of the casual affair…” I’d hardly call myself that. I think that’s just a fancier way of saying I dated a lot.

You can read the full article here. The amazing illustration below (by Lara Tomlin) is supposed to be me, but looks a lot more like my mom I think.

Fling Theory

GD tank

It’s the little things in life that make me happy…

My son’s infectious laugh (and hilarious obsession with water).

Spending New Year’s Eve, four years in a row, with my best friend from high school.

Watching movies in bed with my husband (especially when it’s a movie we both agree on and like).

Spending New Year’s Day with my family, almost every year I’ve been alive (Jan. 1 was my late Grandma Rhoda’s b-day—the most elegant and sophisticated woman I know).

Reading, and actually finishing, a good book.


And the Grateful Dead (Grandma Rhoda didn’t share my love of Jerry Garcia, needless to say). I spent the better part of my high school and college years going to Dead shows, selling veggie bagels and beer in parking lots from Chicago to Indiana to Atlanta, scoring “a miracle” ticket (and backstage passes!) to the last Dead show at Soldier Field with my partner in crime Jamie.

Which is why I am in love with this new tank-top, handmade by my old friend Laura Merlo. She buys soft vintage-like tees adorned with band logos, and then cuts, twists, braids and sews the edges herself, to give them that worn look—like the tees I still have from all the shows I attended, but a helluva lot cuter.

If you’re interested in buying one (she also makes Guns ‘N’ Roses, Beatles and Hendrix tees and tanks, among others), send her an email at laurabethmerlo at gmail dot com. It’s safe to say this is my single favorite piece of clothing right now—I like it so much I wore it on New Year’s Eve.

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I kid you not, Preston’s grandparents got him this faux leather red-and-black bomber jacket for Hanukkah. He’s going to have to watch his back on the playground. Doesn’t this look like the Michael Jackson “Thriller” jacket? I had one in the ’80s that I wore all the time…I’m gonna have to dig up a pic to make a photo comparison.

Cars 2 Bomber Jacket


Cars 2 Bomber Jacket Back


I’m fashionably late on commenting about this but I finally got a chance to read Gwyneth Paltrow’s Goop blog, which isn’t overwhelmingly interesting yet still impressive for someone who certainly doesn’t need the exposure with an online audience. Of course I had to read that controversial post: “A Day in the Life” of someone who has it much better than you. Friends Stella McCartney (the designer and Paul’s daughter) and Juliet de Baubigny (a successful venture capitalist) chronicle a day in their respective lives as working moms. So does Gwyney, she who needs no introduction.

I’m not going to join the hateratti on this one: Despite the bad press it got back in January here, herehere and a ton of other places, the reason it made me feel crappy isn’t because these women are outrageously successful and wealthy and have access to things I don’t. Nope. That’s not what did it for me. In fact, some of the things they do to keep busy when they’re not working aren’t completely out of reach (a trainer, acupuncture, a weekly blow-out, the Tracy Anderson DVD). All these things in moderation are totally doable.

It’s because they have an endless amount of energy for their kids, in spite of all they do. They could easily rely on nannies to raise their kids, but as you’ll read in each of their daily accounts they take multi-tasking to a new level. It actually kind of motivated me to want to work out in the morning to jumpstart my day. (I said kind of.) It also made me want to crawl into bed and turn on E!

Needless to say, a day in their lives doesn’t much resemble a day in mine, save for the presence of coffee. So I thought I’d do my own version of “A Day in the Life,” but with someone who doesn’t have it much better than you…me!

7-8 a.m. Jay and I hit snooze for about an hour, waiting for the nanny to arrive at 8 a.m., hoping (praying) Preston doesn’t wake up and get antsy to the point of screaming for us before she arrives. Those extra minutes in bed are heaven. More likely than not we were up way too late the night before, sometimes till 1 a.m., either watching the worst reality shows on TV or working. Or both, simultaneously.

Morning Playtime with PG9 a.m. Leave for work, after about 20-30 minutes of breakfast and playtime with Preston. Not only is there no morning cardio in my routine, some days I hardly get fresh air, much less walk very far. I go from one indoor parking garage to another. Don’t get me wrong though: Sometimes I break a sweat playing with Preston. Does that count?

9:30 a.m.-5:30 p.m. (or later usually) Chained to my desk at work. And by chained I mean there are days I don’t eat lunch, or visit the ladies room. I can’t disclose the details of what I do (the work we do in the digital division of Playboy is top secret stuff), but let’s just say there’s nary a break in my day; it’s manic. The one thing Gwyney and I do have in common is I have a Keurig in my office, and I use it. A lot. (But it didn’t cost $3,000.) I was averaging two trips to Starbucks a day, now I’m on 2-4 cups of coffee from my Keurig. This might have something to do with why I’m not going to sleep till 1 a.m., which we’ll blame on my mom since she gave me the single-cup coffeemaker for my office. I also have one at home, which I use on weekends. Next to wine, coffee is my single worst vice since becoming a mom. (Yes, I drank both wine and coffee before becoming a mom, but not to this degree.)

5:30 p.m. (or lately 7/8/9 p.m.) It’s a mad dash for the door because if I’m not home by 6 p.m. (the usual time) to relieve the nanny I get the stink eye. Or worse, a silent treatment. Is there anything worse than the silent treatment from your nanny? I have a terrible case of road rage, so the drive home is pretty stressful–as in, I recently told an off-duty S.W.A.T. team officer to f**k off. I make good use of the drive though, and catch up on personal calls. That’s multi-tasking, right? (This is probably why I could use the aforementioned acupuncture.)

6/6:15 p.m. (or lately 8/9 p.m.) I arrive home, just in time to feed Preston dinner (if I’m lucky). This week I’ve been coming home just in time to put him to bed. And what’s that chilling in the fridge? A fresh un-opened bottle of Santa Margarita? For moi? My nanny probably thinks I have a drinking problem, but that’s okay–she’s got her own issues.

PG watching Yo Gabba Gabba6:30/7 p.m. (or later) It’s a battle for the remote control. I want to watch Access Hollywood or Entertainment Tonight (after all, I work in the entertainment industry, this is considered research!), but Preston wants to watch–say it with me now–Yo Gabba Gabba. He usually wins. Could you say no to that face?

7 p.m. Jay’s home! We order in dinner, or he cooks up something on the grill. Love a husband who likes to try out new recipes.

7:30/8 p.m. Playtime with Preston! Shoot hoops, play in his kitchen, make pretend sandwiches, do puzzles, read books, whatever we can do to tire him out before bedtime.

PG cuddling in bed8/8:30 p.m. Pajama time. I take Preston in his bathroom, we brusha, brusha, brusha, he prolongs the routine as much as humanly possible, and then we either read books in my bed whilst, yes, watching another episode of Yo Gabba Gabba, or we do it in a more peaceful environment in his room. Depends on how late it is, both our moods and levels of exhaustion. He usually prefers to cuddle in my bed, and it’s the most intimate time we have together all day. He’s a master cuddler.

9 p.m. He’s in his crib and I’m scratching his back, saying goodnight to everyone in our family, name by name. The kid is a freaking genius. (And he knows exactly how to milk it with me.) And now it’s my turn for bed. Oh, hey elliptical machine, nice to see you’re still collecting dust in the corner of my bedroom! One of these days, one of these days…

A Place of Yes10 p.m. I’m either writing a blog or magazine article, attempting to start on my book proposal, fiddling with Facebook, Twitter, or doing something productive like trying to read an actual book. Currently fondling the pages of “A Place of Yes” by Bethenny Frankel, ya know, real highbrow stuff.

11 p.m. This is as close to “me time” as I get. I’m tired, exhausted actually (have I mentioned that?), but I’m fighting it to stay awake to enjoy this time to myself. Why do I keep myself up so late? Because if I go to sleep now, then I won’t be awake to enjoy it, clearly. I could–I should–be getting more sleep. But I like spending this time to myself, and I want to be up for this party, ya’ll. I’m a really fun person to hang with. Barkley’s in his crate, Jay’s usually at one of his restaurants, Preston’s asleep, and Mommy has full control of the remote.

Midnight/1 a.m. This is usually when Jay declares “lights out” which means the lights literally have to go out, the cordless headphones go on, and I’m left to watch whatever’s on DVR alone and think about how tired I’m going to be for work tomorrow…

What’s your daily routine like?

Categories: Life